How to Forgive Someone

We’ve all heard the saying, “You have to forgive, but you don’t have to forget.” I won’t refute that, but you have to agree that a lot of people use that excuse to never ‘really’ forgive at all. Are you one of those people?

Let’s rephrase it a little. “You have to forgive…and you have to forget the anger, the pain, the anxiety, and everything else that comes with someone sinning against you. But you don’t have to make yourself a target (even though Jesus did).” Sound a little more difficult? This is really the Christian way of life, and it’s going to be difficult. No one promised you would enjoy it.

So we’ll start with the forgiveness. This is where you have the most control, because it’s an act of will. You have to decide to forgive, and then do it. Here’s a short list of what this involves:

•No more daydreaming about your perpetrator’s pain and suffering.

•Stop thinking about the ‘what if’ outcomes, and accept what happened.

•Start praying for the person. Not for their punishment, not for them to see the light…pray for their good and their soul. Say a simple Hail Mary, without meditating on the one you’re praying for. Meditate on the words, and dedicate it to your perpetrator. Let God decide how to reward or punish them.

•If you can do something nice for the person, do it without grumbling and without reminding them of what they did wrong.

•Stop gossiping about them.

•Every time you find yourself thinking about it, change the subject. Think about the starving kids in China, your financial problems, Baby Jesus…anything.

Now that (believe it or not) is the easy part. Now it comes time to deal with the anger and pain. Sometimes it’s easy. But in cases of serious violation, or when someone hurts a loved one, the very idea sounds idiotic. And no, you’ll never completely let go, but you can completely try. And you can start by using some of the techniques listed above.

You’ll probably have to take it further. You’ll have to swallow those emotions. Bury them deep. Yes, I’m going against what every therapist out there is preaching, but talking and sulking is no way to get over anything. You’ve had your period of pity; it’s time to move on. When you feel the flame of anger building inside you, force it to the back of your mind, and let it die. Don’t waste another second of your life stewing. It’ll take practice, but every day is another chance.

Finally, there’s that last part. This is where most of us have trouble. This is also where we have to weigh our duties, and choose what’s most important. Here are a few questions to help you sort it out:

•Does it involve someone under your protection? I’m talking mainly to parents. Our children obviously come first, and we’re never obligated to put them in danger.

•Does it involve a sexual violation? I don’t have to go into this. If someone isn’t treating your body like a Temple of Christ, then stay away from them.

•Does it involve injury? The big question here is ‘How much’? A school boy shouldn’t offer himself out to the wedgie bully, but a pop in the arm is usually more a matter of humiliation than personal injury. If your body is being harmed by someone, you have a right to stop them…but again, Christ didn’t. Also, consider how likely the person is to harm you again. If it was a one-time event, you should let go. On a side note: Repeated domestic violence has several victims, especially children. And track records show that very few offenders ‘only strike once.’ If you’re trying to figure out whether or not to leave such a situation, stoop thinking and get out.

•Does it involve personal property? Who’s property? If you’re raising a family, you can’t risk everything and ignore their needs. But ask yourself if the amount stolen or damaged property is worth the hassle of never trusting someone again.

•Does it invol4AEve your good name? Hunker down and forget about it. The truth will set you free. Lies hurt the liar more than anyone else. If it’s the truth, then just be more careful of what you say…but don’t withhold something begrudgingly.

Written by the copywriters at http://copyforsale.com, where you can find free content for your Christian newsletters and websites.

Copyright Infringement Lawsuits

Affect Individuals And Businesses
By: Richard Cunningham




A copyright infringement lawsuit can occur for any number of reasons: someone using a song in a podcast or radio program, a writer “borrowing” information from another work, copying video or mp3 off the Internet without permission (or sometimes, even to another CD or DVD). Copyright infringement lawsuits are not generally brought to the average person, unless they’re downloading a LOT of music or movies, but usually for large operations: software pirates reselling goods on eBay or to some other unsuspecting victim, someone “sampling” a song to make another, or maybe a person reselling mp3s online.

When you understand the implications of it, copyright infringement lawsuits aren’t frivolous as some people think. For the most part, the average person’s familiarity with a copyright infringement lawsuit is taking down copyrighted material after receiving a nasty email.

If you use works from record albums by major recording stars (like Britney Spears or 50 Cent) to make a different recording as your own, then you can be sued for copyright infringement. Usually these suits will be lost because it’s rather hard to prove inspiration, but they are rather costly and draining, especially if there isn’t a large backing legal team.

Copyright infringement lawsuits for large enterprises can be costly and time consuming. If you work for someone, and you plagiarize someone on the company blog, the whole company can be sued, and you can be fired, for that infraction. Another large copyright infringement lawsuit is the eminent MySpace v. Universal Music Group, who is claiming that MySpace is knowingly committing copyright infringement by allowing users to upload copyrighted material. Even then, Universal Music Group has been negotiating with MySpace and couldn’t come to an agreement -- then they filed suit.

Universal Music Group has an agreement with YouTube, where YouTube agrees to follow Universal’s rules. It’s worked out well thus far, and I think with an agreement in place “user created content” will retain a destination on the Internet.

This is a testament we all need to be with social networking sites and ‘user created content.’ We need to watch ourselves, because many times we may not realize the veracity of our actions.

Sometimes, people break copyright laws on purpose. There is a huge market for pirated software -- from Windows to Photoshop to The Sims. It’s very easy to share peer-to-peer, and because of that, people can resell pirated copies for a high price -- all profit. Or they’ll download MP3 and resell them; or eBooks. People who resell these items get nasty penalties -- with both copyright infringement lawsuits and criminal cases. They’ll pay a hefty fine and go to jail.

Copyright infringement lawsuits can affect any one of us -- from our friends on MySpace to our employer, to the computer geek down the street. It’s easy to violate copyrights, and you have to watch yourself. The chances are good that you won’t be involved in a major copyright infringement lawsuit, but you still need to ensure you’re following copyright laws.

Copyright infringement lawsuits are important to determine what is, and isn’t, applicable to copyright laws. Because of these lawsuits, our laws have changed regarding Fair Use, Internet use, and the Electronic Frontier Foundation and CreativeCommons.com. The lawsuits help us to understand what is, and what isn’t fair -- and these organizations have helped the masses to understand what’s so important about copyright, and why we need to defend our freedom of speech.



About The Author

Richard Cunningham is a freelance journalist who covers copyright law for http://www.ResearchCopyright.com.

5 Tips on How to Avoid a False DUI Breathalyzer Result

By: Lawrence Taylor



Let's say you had a drink or two but don't feel you are under the influence of alcohol. However, you are arrested on suspicion of drunk driving and offered the choice of taking a breath or blood test (or, in some states, urine). Most DUI suspects choose the breath test -- a choice which could doom your chances to prove your innocence. Consider the following advice when deciding which test to take:

1. If you smoke cigarettes, you may want to pass on that Breathalyzer mouthpiece the officer is handing you. Scientific research has shown that smoking can raise the test result considerably -- enough to get you charged and convicted of drunk driving. This is because most breath analyzing devices will falsely report acetaldehyde as alcohol. Acetaldehyde is a compound produced in the liver in small amounts as a by-product in the metabolism of alcohol. However, scientists have found acetaldehyde concentrations in the lungs of smokers are far greater than for non-smokers. ("Origin of Breath Acetaldehyde During Ethanol Oxidation: Effect of Long-Term Cigarette Smoking", 100 Journal of Laboratory Clinical Medicine 908). Translated: because breathalyzers can’t tell the difference between alcohol and acetaldehyde, cigarette smokers will have a higher blood-alcohol reading.

2. If you are a diabetic with possible low blood sugar, you should also avoid the breath test. A well-documented by-product of hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) is a state called ketoacidosis, which causes the production of acetone -- and acetone, like acetaldehyde, will be reported by the Brethalyzer as alcohol. In other words, the Breathalyzer will read significant levels of alcohol on a diabetic’s breath where there may be little or none. See "Diabetes, Breath Acetone and Breathalyzer Accuracy: A Case Study", 9(1) Alcohol, Drugs and Driving (1993). To make matters worse, the reactions of a person in the early stages of a diabetic attack include dizziness, blurred vision, slurred speech, weakness, loss of coordination and confusion -- the same symptoms which the patrol officer is looking for: the clear signs of a person under the influence of alcohol. And the officer's observations are quickly followed by a failing performance on DUI field sobriety tests.

3. Are you on a low-carb diet? Or had nothing to eat in quite awhile? Avoid the Breathalyzer in a DUI investigation -- for the same reasons stated in number 2. Perfectly normal, healthy individuals can experience temporary conditions of low blood sugar after consuming small amounts of alcohol, resulting in exaggerated but false symptoms of intoxication. Fasting glycemia can exist where a person has not eaten in 24 hours or has been on a low-carbohydrate diet. Production of glucose in the liver is stopped while the alcohol is broken down. Result: the blood sugar level will drop, affecting the central nervous system -- and producing symptoms of a person under the influence of alcohol and a higher breath test result.

4. If you have acid reflux or have burped or belched before taking the Breathalyzer, offer to provide a blood sample instead. The reason is that you will be breathing alcohol from your stomach into your throat and oral cavity, where it will stay for 20 minutes or so -- to be breathed directly into the breath machine. This is not a good thing. The machine's computer is multiplying the amount of alcohol in the breath sample by 2100 times to provide a reading of the alcohol in the blood. This is because it assumes the sample came from the lungs, not the stomach, and the average person has 2100 units of alcohol in his blood for every unit of alcohol in his breath (called the partition ratio). The Breathalyzer does not "know" that your breath sample is not from your lungs and that it should not multiply the alcohol level by anything. Result: false high readings -- and a DUI conviction.

5. When you see that officer in the rear-view mirror, don't reach for the mouthwash or breath spray to disguise the drink or two you've had. Most of them contain significant levels of alcohol (Listerine, for example is 27% alcohol) and create a mouth alcohol effect: they remain in the oral cavity for 20 minutes or so -- just long enough to be breathed into the Breathalyzer, with the same results mentioned in number 4. Some breath machines have a mouth alcohol detector, but these are highly unreliable.

About The Author


Lawrence Taylor is the senior member of an AV-rated law firm of Las Vegas DUI lawyers practicing drunk driving defense exclusively. See http://www.duilasvegas.com / for more information.